Don't you love customer service reps?

My favorites are the ones that can barely speak English. So cool.

Makes my life complete.

Huge downside of moving is getting everything in your life switched over to the new address.

I have started making a list of the ridiculous things they say to me.

Examples:

* Can I get your name? (I give it) Thanks, that's not a problem.  Can I get your account number? (I give it) Thanks. That's not a problem. Can I get your new address. (I give it) Thanks, that's not a problem Mrs. _____. *

Honestly, why does this person keep saying "that's not a problem"? Do they know the definition of "that's not a problem"? Of course there's not a problem with me giving you my name, acct #, and new address. You asked for it. Nobody is going out of their way here.

Remember I gave YOU the info - I should be the one saying "that's not a problem" except I wouldn't because all I am offering is basic info, which common sense already suggests is really "not a problem" to hand over and obviously quite necessary in this situation. 

*I was on the phone for about two minutes with TMobile. My question was answered quickly, I was satisfied and I was about to say goodbye until I guess the rep didn't feel like he had gotten to know me well enough. 

After an awkward pause he busts out, "So........ how's the move going"

(are we friends? )

I say, "Slowly but surely. It takes time."

"That's nice. Have a nice day."

What?

Does the customer service rep have a check-off sheet near him requiring him to ask a pleasant friendly question?

If so, they should have a box entitled "appropriate response to customers answer to your pleasant friendly question".

*I had one guy who reminded me what his name was every other sentence. "Oh by the way, my name is Henry."

Henry,

I really appreciated your help with getting my Internet set up. I will never forget your name. I never had an opportunity too. I now know that you recently moved to Jacksonville but are originally from Chicago. You really miss Chicago. You used to work for T-Mobile. You also used to work for Charter and you think they're worthless. I am sorry I did awkward laughs at your jokes. I didn't really think it was funny that my phone number had so many 5's and that now you know where to go if you ever need one.

Henry, my dear friend Henry - No matter what your supervisors are telling you, when customers call in, all they really care about is getting their service taken care of. 

No need for small talk.

Sorry Buddy.

* After giving a rep our new address she exclaimed, "Oh, the potato state! Does ID use their potatoes to make vodka? I love my vodka."

Wow.

No clue.

But, if you're using that vodka for cooking purposes, then I really hope that's where our potatoes are going because you seemed genuinely happy about it.

So there are two things to consider here. A. customer service reps say entertaining things or  B. I need a life because I make lists of what customer service reps say. Hmmm...