With Mother's Day around the corner I thought I would type up a lovely little piece on the importance of being a mother, but after reading my dear sister's blog on Sunday, I realized that she had summed it up perfectly and her eloquent words would be incredibly hard to compete with.
So, I decided to take another route, one that would be self gratifying and make me appreciate the joys of motherhood. I was going to observe my interaction with my children to a T, making every moment count, while basking in the company of these two darling little blessings.
And, that my friends, is when all H E DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS broke loose... I won't take up your time with detail overload, but let me provide you with some famous quotes of the day...
Monday - Mom, that was so cool when I was in the bathroom and I had held my poop for so long that it just blasted out once I started pushing like this GGHHHHHHHAAAA! (Little C provided everyone in Desert Book with this update after using their facilities).
Tuesday - Mom, you are ruining my life! (Little C was performing his chores and I had decided to help him a little bit by folding a blanket. Ultimately, I guess this resulted in me ruining his life).
Wednesday - Mom, I pooped, I pooped, and it is squishing out everywhere! (Little C has been somewhat constipated and has decided that if he holds it long enough, he will then be able to, yes you guessed it, blast it out. Unfortunately, he had held it for a little too long and it had decided to blast out all on its very own, in my car).
Lessons to be learned:
* Some underwear is not worth saving
*Never buy a brand new car
*Don't buy pre-made cookie dough. You'll down it all in self medication.
*Give your own mother a big hug when she cleans up the second blow out of the day, that was provided by your 5 month old - granted a 5 yr old's poop is in a whole different arena than a 5 month old's poop
*Remind yourself that your children are miracles
*After a few days, the constant smell of feces should leave the interior of your nostrils
*Always have a Pepsi on hand
*Sometimes you may not enjoy the moment, but isn't great to smile at the memory?
All jokes set aside...
My husband and I recently decided that I should stay at home with our children. After being a loan officer and working for the same company for five years, this was a very difficult transition for me. Yet so rewarding...
Instead of my big office and a receptionist to take my calls... I can wake up and cuddle my two little kids longer, who have somehow magically appeared in our king size bed. (okay the baby is too young to sneak, I guess I sometimes just have to steal him from his bed and bring him to ours)
Instead of shaking someones hand and telling them how much we appreciate their business... I can give my five year old son the thumbs up sign after watching him pass Level 2 in swim lessons.
Instead of watching the various loan awards appear on my office wall... I can enjoy my fresh cut bouquet of dandelions my children have put out on display.
Instead of the CEO telling me that he appreciates my excellent member service skills... I get to hear, "You're so weird mom, but your the best mom in the world."
Instead of observing a trainee's glee at finally grasping a change in loan policy... I can smile, and realize that I am truly making a difference, when Little C reminds us to have family scripture and prayer.
Being a mother truly is a blessing. And I have no problem trading in my old job title for the new one... Professional Feces Cleanup Operator... with years of experience....
Happy Mother's Day to all of you wonderful Mothers -and especially to my very own!
In his defense, he does uphold the proper body type for men supporting this particular kind of art work very well.
Behold the talented artist below!
In his defense, he does uphold the proper body type for men supporting this particular kind of art work very well.
Behold the talented artist below!
On another note, putting socks on your head probably removes you from the red neck realm into, quite frankly, just being odd.
Maybe this is why the Beloved Spouse sports the attire seen above. But, what else are you supposed to do with all those socks who have lost their mates?
You guys put them on your heads and take pictures too right?
