The Beloved and I journeyed down a new path this past Easter Sunday.
The Goal:
Cook a Turkey -

Sometimes you should just stick with the basics - ex: being content devouring these wonderful homemade cinnamon rolls The Beloved made earlier in the day.
But no...
our domesticated turkey desire had to overrule.

But - "someone" forgot to thaw out the turkey. And that "someone", who let's face it - was me, decided that instead of simply cooking the turkey for a few more hours, would thaw it out in the bath tub.
In warm water.
Which we later found out causes bacteria to form.
Sweet.
I love bacteria. Especially on Easter.

Did you know that soaking a turkey in a bathtub for four hours erases the weight right off the packaging?
Neither did we.

Around two we decided that the turkey was thaw enough and I proceeded to call my little mother to get directions.
Preparedness is my middle name.
Right...
So - Question:
Do turkey farmers have a personal vendetta against all turkey eating mankind?
I believe the answer must be yes. My theory -one day, unhappy with their chosen career path, turkey farmers decided to get back at all happily employed turkey lovin' folk by leaving the
NECK, HEART, AND GIZZARD in the bird.
Now, someone very close to my heart, who birthed me - is very fond of the gizzard. But, I find this attraction to be rare... very rare.
Side note: I have not researched the specifics re: this vendetta - so no facts please. I am perfectly happy living in my "no neck, heart, and gizzard world".
Plus, sometimes innocent victims, who are completely unfamiliar with how long a turkey neck is - think they've removed everything successfully - only to find the cooked neck while carving the turkey.
Ewwww.
In the meantime, around 9 p.m. the egg coloring begins.
Gadashio managed to sip down a little vinegar and then tried to lick every egg he came into contact with.
You can see the joy on his egg coloring partners faces.


At 10:00 p.m. we pull the turkey out of the oven. (we had Mac N' Cheese @ 6 :))
We call my mom and ask if she thinks the turkey is done.
She replies in her nicest, most patient voice,
"If you have been cooking it since the last time you called me - I am sure it is done."
We knew that.
We did.
Elementary my Dear Watson.

You'd think the photo below would encourage me to forget about the turkey feast and just put my poor little children to bed.
But all of my logical senses had long since vanished.
Everybody was going to eat this Easter meal -
AND THEY WERE GOING TO LOVE IT!

The turkey ended up tasting great.
Unfortunately, although we have a family of five, only 3 out of those 5 mouths can truly eat a regular poultry portion.
So the turkey celebration will continue for the next few weeks.
Good thing we're mormon, because we need all of the casserole recipes we can get.
I am still having nightmares of cooked turkey neck.
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
As for the bacteria - we haven't felt any effects yet. Maybe that's what happens when you cook a turkey for eight hoursl
Next year we are supporting these three beautiful words:
pre-cooked turkey breast.